Bluegrass and Purple Cows

Could it be? Is spring actually here? I do believe that it may be! The softly blowing warm breezes accompanied by the sweet caress of the sun have woken the gently budding trees and early spring flowers. Our pear trees in the front yard are looking absolutely lovely. I can’t wait for them to grow a few more years. I love large trees full of early spring bloom.

Of course, spring in Eastern Kentucky is still highly unpredictable. By the time you read this, the weather could have taken a turn for the worse. It could even be….gasp….snowing again. With the crazy weather we have had this year, anything is possible.

However, since we have been having some really nice weather lately, Lisa and I decided to get out and about. I have probably mentioned this before, but Lisa and I love to get out in the car on a really nice day and just drive. We won’t really have a destination in mind. Usually we will just pull up to an intersection and Lisa will ask me if I want to go left or right. At the next intersection, she will decide. And so on and so on until we find ourselves deep in the hills of a beautiful Eastern Kentucky day.

Recently we found ourselves heading toward Natural Bridge. I hadn’t been there in a while, so we decided to drive on in and look around. Everything was still shut down for the season, but you could tell that things were starting to be cleaned up for the upcoming tourist season. There is something sad about the place when it is all shut down. It reminds me of an empty playground…existing without a purpose. But soon things will change and the people will return.

I’ll have to admit that it was pretty cool to visit the place during the off-season. There weren’t throngs of people around. It was very quiet. Sitting on one of the benches at Hoedown Island, all that I could hear was the wind in the tops of the trees. Making a hushing sound, the wind was trying to lull everything back to sleep….Nature’s snooze button. But the sun was shining and the birds were starting to chirp. Time cannot be halted. So onward we continue to march. Such is life.

After a nice relaxing moment at Natural Bridge, Lisa and I drove on toward Beattyville. Lisa had always wanted to eat at the Purple Cow Restaurant. I had only eaten there once as a child and decided that I would like to eat there again as well. Stopping in, I was surprised to find that, besides the staff, we were the only people in the place.

If you have never eaten at the Purple Cow before, you are missing an experience. The place is an historic restaurant from the 1930’s. While it may have seen its better days as far as interior decoration, one does have a sense of almost stepping back in time when entering the place. However, I was surprised to see that the place has carpet that looked stained with food. I would suggest that they take up the carpet and put down tile. It would give the restaurant an even more authentic feel.



On the back wall, someone had painted a nice country scene that included a large purple cow resting in the grasses. It was quite a mural! Other than that, the other decorations were run-of-the-mill. I was sort of disappointed. I was sort of hoping to find decorations that had been saved from over the years. Other than the mural of the field and the purple cow, I could have been in any restaurant. However, I will say that the place was very clean. It reminded me of the Family Diner in Jackson before it burned down.

Lisa and I both ordered one of the specials of the day…roast beef with mashed potatoes. The food arrived quickly, which was a plus since we were both rather hungry from our day of adventuring. The meal consisted of roast beef, mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans, and a roll with butter. Everything was great. The beef was fork tender, the potatoes tasted homemade, and the beans were definitely a specialty of the house. The only complaint that I had about the meal was the gravy. It was obviously from a jar or a mix….not homemade. Since it was poured all over the beef and potatoes, it took away a little from an otherwise lovely meal. I hope that they learn to make homemade gravy with this meal. It would make it perfect!



The best thing about the place was the friendliness of the staff. We were welcomed at the door, and our waitress was very attentive. She kept our glasses filled and checked with us regularly to see if there was anything that we needed. I felt at home. Keep up the good work!

Making our way home, we felt as though we had had a fantastic day. The weather had been great. Our meal had been very nice. As we continue to get deeper and deeper into the warm waters of spring, hopefully these days will come more and more often. Care to go for a swim?

Until next week….class dismissed!

Uncle General

My dad recently told me the funniest story that I had ever heard about my great uncle, General Lee. General died when I was very young, so I never knew him. Also, for some reason, everyone in the family pronounced his name with a real Southern drawl. Up until last week, I thought that his name was Gennel. Go figure.

Anyway, my great uncle General had moved to Chicago during the late 60’s to find work. As you may know, there was a huge migration of people from the Appalachian area at this time in history. Several thousands of people flocked to the north to find work in the factories of Indiana and Illinois. You may still have family in the area today.

General was living in Chicago at this time and was trying to find work. Unfortunately he couldn’t read or write. So, he got one of his friends to fill out his employment application for him. His friends decided to play a joke on him and wrote down on his application that he had graduated high school and had gone to two years of college. When he turned in his application, the company put him in an office position. I am not sure what they wanted him to work on, but it involved a lot of paperwork. They kept checking on him throughout the day, but he never seemed to make any progress.

Finally, his supervisor asked him if anything was wrong. General said that he didn’t know what they wanted him to do.

“You went to school, didn’t you,” his supervisor asked him, “Surely this shouldn’t be too hard for someone with your education.”

“Yeah,” my great uncle stated, “I went to school for a lot of years. I just never could learn anything!”

Needless to say that General didn’t get to keep his cushy office position for long. He ended up the day working with the custodial staff. From what Dad said though, he never did keep one job for very long. He was a Jack of all trades.

Another story that involved my great uncle General dealt with the problems that people often have with language barriers. As I stated before, I had always thought that his name was Gennel because that is how everyone in my family has pronounced it all these years. Well, in Chicago, it is obvious that there would be a language difference. This caused some problems for my great uncle.

One day, he went to the drug store on the corner to buy a pitcher so that he could keep cold water in the refrigerator. When he went into the store, he told the ladies that were working that he was looking for a “picture.” Confused, they brought him a picture album and several picture frames. General just kept on getting angrier and angrier.

Finally, he said, “No! I want a picture! Something to make water in!”

Of course, what he really meant was something to keep water in. However, the workers had something else in mind. They brought him a bedpan!!! You can imagine my great uncle’s response. Needless to say, I can’t put it in print…LOL!

I wish that I could have gotten to know my great uncle better. He seemed like he really enjoyed life and lived it to the fullest. I hope that each of you is doing the same. Until next time…class dismissed!

Keep Working....Keep Learning....Don't Let Others Keep You Down

Everyone gets up each day with a clean slate ahead of them. We are faced with literally hundreds of choices that we can make from what to wear, what to eat, and how to interact with others. One thing that I find interesting is that we not only have an effect on ourselves with these decisions. We also have a major impact on other people around us. For example, let’s imagine that you are really grumpy because you didn’t win the Power Ball jackpot. Because of this, you are very rude to the waitress at Hardee’s while you are getting your morning biscuit and coffee. This brings down her mood and so she takes it out on other customers who innocently walk in wanting some breakfast. These people might feel bad enough to snap at their kids when they get back in the car.

Wow! Your one little action just created a big negative vibe for several people in the community. What a bummer. Just imagine what we could do if we took the time to always be aware of how we are acting. If we tried to be positive and have a great outlook on life even when we didn’t really feel like it, just imagine the possibilities. You may have heard the term, “Fake it until you make it.” That isn’t what I am talking about here. I am talking about taking the time to be genuinely caring to others around us. It doesn’t take as much effort as you might imagine. And believe me…people can tell when you fake it.

Now that I have gotten this little tidbit off my mind, I want you to focus on why you do the things that you do. What is it that drives you to be the person that you have become? For me, the answer is pretty easy.

When I was growing up here in Breathitt County, my family didn’t have a lot. I wouldn’t say that we were poor, but I never had everything handed to me either. Like a lot of other people, I knew what it was like to do without. One positive aspect in my life was school. I had some wonderful teachers when I was growing up who really showed that they cared for me and encouraged me to grow.

At Caney Elementary School, Ina Southwood was one tough woman who really took the time to stand up for her students and who also took the time to show her students that she cared for them. She was always looking out for me and encouraging me to work hard in school. She was the best teacher that I ever had and I still appreciate her to this very day. I try to pattern a lot of my teaching practices from what I remember about her. It isn’t easy though. It’s hard to compete with someone as great as Ina!

When I decided to become a teacher, I knew that I wanted to teach in Breathitt County. There are a lot of kids in this county that are growing up and facing the same things that I faced when I was their age. So, I guess that I could say that the main thing that is driving me to do the things that I do is the fact that I want to help others the way that I was helped. I want to be a positive influence in their lives. I really care about the future of this county.

Today, I was telling my students that there are a lot of outside powers that would love nothing better than to keep people in this region poor and uneducated. If people are poor and uneducated, they are easier to control. I told the kids that they owed it to themselves to work hard and to get as smart as they could. Smart people ask questions. Smart people are not easy to control. Smart people work to better their lives and the lives of the people around them.

If you happened to see the latest 20/20 on television that portrayed a lot of negative stereotypes about our region, you often wonder what happened to all of the good things in our area? We have people in Eastern Kentucky who make a great living, live in decent housing, and drive pretty nice automobiles. We have professionals…and yes, we have poverty. But then again…so does every region in the United States…and the world. Why does the news feel the constant need to berate and belittle people in the Appalachian region? It makes good ratings, and that equals more dollars for them.

So once again, I ask you….what drives you? What makes you do the things that you do each day? Take a moment to think about it. The answer may just surprise you. Until next week…class dismissed!

Hiccups in Life

Sometimes the world gets the hiccups. Everything is going along in a relatively frictionless slide with each day passing smoothly into the next. And then – hiccup – everything changes.

If we are lucky, these changes will be positive. Perhaps Fate has decreed that the winning lottery ticket will find its way into our hands. Maybe we get that long-deserved and hard-earned promotion at work. And for some, the news of a new baby in the family brings tears of happiness. For example, my cousin Christianne just had her first child, a little girl named Nicole. Congrats Christianne!

But what if we aren’t so fortunate? Then the hiccups in life can bring about near disastrous events. The loss of a job doesn’t seem too far out there, especially in the downturn of today’s economy. How many lives and dreams have been ruined because of this very fact?

Then again, the economy can improve. People can get new training and new employment. What if – instead – the hiccup is more personal and more direct? What if it is sickness or even death?

Human beings are remarkable creatures. We go through each and every day of our lives knowing our mortal frailty and limitations. We even know that life is not infinite on this earth. We each have a certain set number of days that we are using up at a constant rate.

But, as I have stated before, we are remarkable. We go about our lives without seemingly giving these things a second thought. True, the religious sects often preach and wail about such things. In turn, this brings about uncomfortable and forced acknowledgement. But as a whole, we do not spend each and every minute of our days thinking about our limitations. To do so would bring about madness.

So we are often surprised when life’s hiccups bring about these less than desirable changes into our own lives.

If this is the case, then you may be wondering what keeps everything from completely disintegrating when we are faced with such. In my experience, there is one force that is powerful enough to soothe any hiccups in life. That is the power of love.

In the past few months, I have experienced several incidents of sickness and death with members of my family, my friends, and even coworkers. In each case, there was enough cause to justify a breakdown in the lives and mental well-being of everyone involved. But I have also observed how love has instead strengthened these individuals.

The drawing together of family and friends at the bedside of the sick or dying allows them to express their love and give their support. With each person supporting just a little, the group as a whole is able to bear quite a bit.

My wife and I used to own a couch which we purchased basically because it was cheap – and we were poor at the time. It wasn’t a very comfortable piece of furniture, so when it came time for us to move, we decided to get rid of it.

You should have seen us trying to get this thing out of our apartment! It was three times as heavy as it was uncomfortable. I joked with Lisa that the reason it was such a lousy sofa was because it was made of solid rock!

This thing was impossible for one person to move and even for the two of us to lift. So, we did what anyone would do. We called over some of our friends and got them to come and help. What was an impossible task for one was nothing when there were six of us doing the work. We were easily able to pack that old sofa out to the dumpster.

So what does this have to do with our lives and those unexpected changes? Well…everything! Don’t try to face these challenges alone. What may seem to be a Herculean task to one may not seem as trying when we are able to draw strength from friends, family, and loved ones.

We are all in this thing called life together. None of us are immune to the unexpected. And as soon as we think we are, life will come along and pull the rug out from under our feet!

We are all connected. Today, I may be in one of life’s high phases while you may be facing trials. Tomorrow, the situation may be reversed. But if we all stand by each other to help each other up, we will all come through this a little easier than we would alone. So the next time you are down, I will do my best to offer you my hand in support. And by pulling you up, I pull myself up also.

Dragonfly Dreams, Part Twenty, The End of the Story

“Don’t do it Chuck,” Frank said as his friend took a step toward the large, lush tree….supposedly the Tree of Life, “If she wants that Fruit bad enough…let her get it herself.”

Chuck paused, but only for a second, “Sorry mate. But she who holds the gun…makes the rules!”

Janet Jones just smirked again and waved her pistol. She had the upper hand. She had won. Soon, she would have the Fruit from the Tree of Life…and then she wouldn’t have a use for them anymore. She had said that she would let them go…but Frank seriously doubted it.

“Hurry it up!” Janet snapped, eyeing the soft, full, golden fruit that was hanging heavily from the branches of the tree. It looked so appetizing. Frank’s mouth was watering…even as he stared death in the face.

Frank couldn’t believe that it was all going to end this way. All of his adventures. The police in the airport…the race through the city…the trek into the jungle….the flight with the large dragonfly…and meeting Oprah Winfrey’s clone. It had all been for nothing. He felt angry and weak at the same time. Maybe he should just rush Janet and get it all over with….take her down once and for all!

“Don’t even think about it,” Janet turned her gun toward Frank’s face, “Take one step toward me and I’ll blow your head off!”

“Hold on now, old girl,” Chuck said, “I’m getting you what you want.”

The sound of arguing made the monkeys in the trees overhead start their squawking again. It sounded like they were directly overhead now….looking down at the commotion on the ground.

Frank and Janet both looked on in wonder as Chuck walked closer to the Tree of Life. Wasn’t it supposed to be guarded or something? Frank knew that at any moment that Chuck was going to be attacked by something. Would it be another large monkey like the one which had killed Gordon? Or would it be something mystical…a large angel brandishing a flaming sword?

But in the end, it turned out to be nothing. Standing on his tip-toes, Chuck reached up and plucked the largest piece of Fruit that he could get. To Frank, it looked like a cross between an apple and a pear. Except the color was all wrong. It was golden. Not yellow…it looked like it was made of real gold. The smell….a mix of honey and spice….increased and made his head spin. He wanted the Fruit for himself!

“But you know that it isn’t for you to eat,” he said to himself. Somehow, he knew that it would be wrong to take the fruit. It would be wrong to eat of it.

Now that she saw that Chuck was in no apparent danger, Janet raced over to him and snatched the fruit out of his hands.

She started to laugh, “It’s mine! It’s finally MINE!”

Lifting the Fruit to her nose, she inhaled deeply. Chuck looked like he was about to attack her…take back the Fruit that Janet had snatched from his hands.

“Chuck…NO!” Frank called, “Get over here. Something isn’t right! Don’t end up dead…like Harry.”

Maybe it was the sound of Frank’s voice…..or maybe it was the mention of Harry’s name…..but the result was the same. Chuck snapped out of his daze and quickly made his way over to Frank’s side.

Janet watched him walk away, but she didn’t make any move with her gun. She was too enticed with her prize.

“Oh my god!” her lips quivered, “It smells so GOOD! I can’t believe that it is finally mine…all mine!”

“Janet….wait,” Frank said, “Don’t eat it. Something isn’t right about this. I can feel it!”

Her lips curled back in a defiant sneer, Janet just chuckled, “The only thing that you feel is the fact that you are a LOSER. I won. I have the Fruit. I’m going to live FOREVER!”

And with that, she took a huge bite from the Fruit. Dark juice squirted out and ran down her chin as she chewed noisily.

“It tastes so GOOD!” she crowed, taking another large bite, “It’s like sunshine exploding inside my mouth.”

Slurping and spewing small pieces of fruit, her mouth worked feverishly to eat the Fruit as quickly as she could. It was like she couldn’t shovel it in fast enough. With a third bite, she had finished off more than half of the fruit. Her throat worked to swallow it just as quickly.

“Looks like our goose is cooked mate,” Chuck said, “We lost. She won. End of the game…you know?”

“Not so fast,” Frank said, his eyes never leaving Janet’s face for even one second, “Look!”

Something was happening. Slowly, a change was taking place. For a second, Frank hadn’t seen it…but now it was very apparent. Fur was starting to grow on Janet’s face. Fur!

Sensing the change, Janet stopped chewing. Throwing the fruit down on the ground, she began to cough and splutter….spitting pieces of half chewed fruit everywhere. She was choking…..choking on the Fruit that she had been trying to cram down her craw just moments before.

“What’s….what’s going on?” she screeched, her hands drawing up….fingers creaking…..turning black. Her gun dropped…useless….onto the Garden floor beside her.

Amazed…unable to say anything….both Frank and Chuck watched as the transformation sped up. Fur sprouted all over Janet’s body. Her eyes turned black and beady….getting smaller and closer together. Her nose shrank and turned black as well…..a moist film growing over it. It began to twitch excitedly. And then Janet….began to shrink. Slowly at first…and then quickly….she got smaller and smaller. She shrank into her clothes….slowly disappearing into her large blouse which now served as a tent.

“Nooooo!” she screamed, “Help me! Please…..it hurts! It hurts! It burns! Aaaaaaaaaaaaa!”

And then her screams turned into screeches. Screeches that sounded somewhat familiar. Screeches that sounded like…

“The monkeys,” Chuck whispered, “She sounds just like those monkeys that have been swinging around us all this time.”

And so it was. With one last convulsion, the transformation completed itself. Springing from her blouse, Janet Jones….now a small, plump monkey….quickly ran across the grass and climbed the Tree of Life. She stopped midway to look back and give one final screech of anger before disappearing into the branches. Overhead, the rest of the monkey pack began to wail….greeting their newest member.

“My God!” Frank said, “Do you think that all of those….those monkeys….were once….”

“People,” Chuck was scanning the tops of the branches, trying to see Janet Jones and the rest of the pack, “Yes….yes I do. This must be the curse that was placed on the Tree of Life.”

Frank tried to imagine it. To live forever….but as a monkey. To never die. But to be an animal. To be immortal. But never, ever leave the Garden.

“This isn’t what she had in mind,” Frank said, “She wanted power….and instead she found….”

“Living Hell,” Chuck said, “But…I have to say…it couldn’t have happened to a more deserving person.”

“And one more thing,” Frank said, “I think I know who…or what…is taking care of the Garden.”

“You mean…..the monkeys are doing it?” Chuck asked.

Frank nodded. It made perfect sense. What else did they have to do? When you live forever, time has little meaning. He shuddered suddenly like someone had walked over his grave. He tried to imagine the life of the monkeys….living forever…trapped in servitude to the very Garden which had changed them.

“Come on mate,” Chuck continued, “Let’s get out of this place.”

And so, turning back toward the staircase which would lead them out of the Garden of Eden….out of the temple which had brought only death and misery….Chuck and Frank began to make their way back to the outside world. Frank wasn’t sure what he was going to do now. There was so much swirling in his head that he couldn’t think…..but one thing was for sure. He was going to be looking for another job.

“Nobody needs a job this bad,” he murmured to himself.

Just before they walked out of the temple door and back into the Brazilian jungle, Frank turned to take one last look. It was no surprise to him that he saw….hovering there in the air….the largest dragonfly that he had ever seen in his life. The dragonfly…the Face of God. This is what Mizzus Irza had seen. This is what had been leading him all this time. Bowing his head and closing his eyes, he turned and stepped out into the warm, Brazilian sunshine. He really needed a vacation.

“How about a trip to the Caribbean?” he asked Chuck as they walked down the steps.

“Now you’re talking mate!”

The air had never smelled sweeter. Frank smiled.

Elk Herd in Breathitt County

My wife Lisa and I were driving back home from Jackson the other day when we saw this herd of elk at Clayhole. It was magical!

Dragonfly Dreams, Part Nineteen

There are moments in our life when time seems to speed up, bringing each new day crashing into our existence without reason or mercy. Then, there are those when time seems to stand still…almost stop. This was one of those moments for Frank Mason. Slowly….carefully….he led the way deeper and deeper onto the lush green floor of the inner temple. Supposedly, this was the Garden of Eden. At any other time, he may have been ecstatic to make such a discovery. Of course, at any other time, he wouldn’t have had a murderer holding a gun toward the back of his head.

Janet Jones let out a small grunt from behind him. “Don’t try anything foolish or your other pal here will get it!”

Frank knew what she meant. Janet had already killed one person…Harry, the shapeshifter. She had put a bullet into his brain as easily as a kid putting quarters in a gumball machine. He knew that she would probably end up just killing both him and Chuck anyway. But he had to stall for time. He had to think of some way out of this mess.

“Mate,” Chuck whispered from his left, “I can’t believe that you are actually leading her to the Tree of Life! Come on mate! You should know better than that.”

“I’m trying to come up with a plan,” Frank whispered back.

A shot fired and a bullet whizzed over their heads. “Stop that whispering!” Janet ordered.

As they entered the Garden of Eden proper, Frank got a better sense of the place. At first, he thought that the trees and plants were just growing up between the stones in the floor. The soft cushion beneath his feet told him differently. There was actual soil underneath there! He wondered if this temple was built by man or angels or by God Himself? So many unanswered questions!

As if agreeing with him, the swarm of monkeys in the branches overhead started their squawking once more. They kept their distance, but Frank could tell that the band of monkeys was following them. He wondered if they were going to attack them like the huge monkey outside the temple had attacked and killed Gordon Jones. Maybe these monkeys would rip the head off of Ms. Jones.

“Excuse me,” Chuck called out so that Janet could hear him, “In the Bible, doesn’t it state that the Tree of Life is guarded or something? How do you even know that you are going to be able to get near it?”

“I don’t,” Janet said, “But that is where you two come in. I need Frank to find the Tree…and I need you to test the waters…so to speak. To see if there really is a trap.”

“Oh,” Chuck said, “Glad that you’re keeping me around for something.”

“Don’t worry,” Janet said, “I just want the fruit. Once I get it, you two are free to go about your business. I won’t have any further use for you.”

Somehow, Frank didn’t think that she was telling the complete truth.

On they trudged through the Garden. For some place which hadn’t supposedly had any human interaction for thousands of years, the grounds were remarkably well kept. The grass was cut short, the trees were trimmed into a pleasing shape….even the flowers seemed to be well tended.

“Hey Chuck,” Frank whispered, risking the wrath of Janet Jones once more, “Have you noticed how well kept this place is? Who do you think does all of that?”

“I don’t know mate,” Chuck whispered back, “But I see what you mean. This place doesn’t exactly look deserted…does it?”

And then, the music started. Soft at first…and then it quickly grew louder and louder. Frank could recognize it anywhere. It was the voice of Billie Holiday. Once again, he was lost in the song.

There’s a saying old, says that love is blind
Still we’re often told…seek and you shall find

And suddenly it became effortless. Everything else disappeared for him. In his mind, he wasn’t thinking about Chuck….or poor dead Harry….or even Janet Jones with her deadly gun. Everything in his mind focused on one thing…the great and powerful Tree of Life. And then his feet started to move….almost seemed to float on the grass as they carried him first in one direction and then another. Deeper and deeper into the Garden he traveled.

And then, there it was in front of them. The most beautiful tree that he had ever seen in his life. The leaves were so green that it hurt his eyes just to look at them. The branches curved out from the great and sturdy trunk so gracefully that they seemed to be about to break into a ballet at any moment. And the fruit….so full, so ripe, and so golden. And it wasn’t just appetizing to the eye….the scent was full of wonderful things….honey, spices, and a touch of zest that he couldn’t quite identify.

Instantly he was struck with a hunger that he knew nothing on the planet would ease…except for this fruit…this fruit of the Tree of Life. His mouth began to water. He glanced over at Chuck and Janet Jones and saw that the Tree was having the same effect on them. They both had a glazed, faraway look on their eyes.

Shaking her head, Janet suddenly snapped out of the daze that she had been in. She took two steps toward the Tree….anxious to get her hands on the Fruit. But then…she stopped. She looked around at them and grinned an evil grin.

“You know…this is all too easy,” she said, “And I DO think that there will probably be a trap.”

Her hand snapped like a cobra…holding her gun toward Chuck. “I need you to go and be my gatherer. You are….expendable.”

And as if to make her point come across even more, she cocked her gun.

“You have until the count of three,” she said, “One….two….”

Until next week….class dismissed.